andy+rebecca at casa romantica {wedding}

Andy and Rebecca got married back in February at the beautiful Casa Romantica in San Clemente, Calif. After shooting there, it's definitely one of my top venues, and I had a great time with Andy and Rebecca throughout their big day. Their ceremony was intimate, entertaining and heartfelt, and their reception was the biggest dance party I've ever been to! Andy and Rebecca were the greatest newlyweds to work with and I had a blast as their photographer. Here are a few of my favorites from their day!

the reconciliation of love and defeat.

the sun is for others:
those above holding on to the way you taste,
as if we could spoon
next to hours-old saliva and sweat.
     here's to last night,
     when insomnia was preferred,
     the dreams too rich and warm
     to make the morning anything but envious.
in them was the bed of an olive tree,
and words, your proclamations molding us
Thoreaus against the world,
instead of a leftover heroine
searching Beatles' songs
for the meaning of love.
     but if a note could last
longer than the moon
then it'd be
the eskimo kiss on a porch in San Francisco,
the photo of a night's coast no one wanted,
love hidden in a toast at the bars of our youth.

a love poem, by Nick of "New Girl"

As a photographer, I use Photoshop to tweak colors, mess with white balance, fix a skin blemish or two... 

and as a fan of everything to do with "New Girl," I do this with it. Best. Love Poem. Ever.

love is in the air...

...and we've got the weddings to prove it! :)

Cuddles and Rage!

A new favorite website to waste time on: CuddlesAndRage.com. 

They create and photograph adorably comical GIFs and dioramas like this one, appropriately titled "The Flasher:"

Oh, and this, which had me laughing for 10 straight whole minutes:

Check them out! Amid weekends and workdays of stress, deadlines and overall craziness, it's good to laugh. :)

'they grip the ground as though they liked it, and though fast-rooted, travel as far as we do.'

A few weeks ago I was up late watching television, and an old episode of "The Office" came on. In it, Jim and Pam are at church for the dedication of their baby, Cece, and in typical Michael Scott-fashion, their boss invites the entire gang as part of Jim and Pam's "family." It's rather subtle, but overwhelmingly hilarious, as you watch Michael warm up more and more to the idea of church as parishioners shake his hand, wish him good morning and give Michael what he ultimately always wants at the end of every episode: love. Near the middle of the storyline, a youth group is saying its goodbyes as it takes off for a mission trip to Mexico. Before Michael can contain himself, him and Andy slip into the crowd of kids and file right onto the bus with the rest of them, yearning for that feeling of purpose amid community.

I honest to goodness had to channel every bit of rationality I have to avoid doing nearly the same thing myself this afternoon.

Today, my family found out my baby brother was officially going to Chapman University; the acceptance letter was in, the scholarships lined up, the leftover finances figured out. A former Panther myself, I had been secretly hoping that he would find himself at my alumni come next fall. So in celebration, I headed to the Orange campus this afternoon to pick him up the obligatory car decal every good college kid headed for the best four years of their life should have. I've been back to Chapman many times since graduating five years ago, but this time, as I walked onto campus, I found my heart fighting its way up my throat, and swallowing to take a normal breath was like pushing a bowling ball through a needle head. I passed by a tour of incoming freshmen, and ever-so-briefly entertained the probability of passing for an 18-year-old as I fought back the urge to slip in the crowd of students walking by the very water fountain I once jumped into as a senior rocking a sports bra and a healthy amount of liquid courage during my last-ever Undie Run. And though I continued past them and kept up the semblance of normalcy, I found myself wiping away a few tears even while privately chastising myself for being such a sentimental sack.

I keep waiting to be content with true adulthood and yet I'm never really quite there. I've been told this comes with your 30s, and I hope so, because - as someone who graduated from college at 21 - my 20s have been wrought with ambiguity and tension. Not that I haven't been blessed - I have some of the very best people in my life, have been given great artistic and professional opportunities, and continue to look forward to see what comes of it all, but it's been partnered with the feeling of a never-ending trek uphill, something I don't remember feeling while in college. And while there is a beauty in that journey, sometimes I am tired, and there is a yearning for the sense of pure and unfiltered happiness that I think most of us experienced in college without truly appreciating it enough in the moment.

In college, what one person felt for me didn't make or break my heart; rather, love was lighthearted. Some days I'd flirt with the cute guy from cultural anthropology; I'd have crushes on the strangers I knew I'd never marry in a million years because it was harmless to; every now and then, I'd let an intriguing boy kiss me at the end of the night — but for the most part, I spent my nights arm in arm with my roommates, knowing they loved me like family and not caring about a single other person who didn't. The first time I truly thought I was going to conquer the world came in the form of a phone call during my sophomore year from the Orange County Register, telling me I was their newest copy editing intern; I called my mom in tears from a parking lot at the lawyer's office I was working for, jumping up and down outside my car, oblivious to the looks I was getting from attorneys who screamed corporate America in their button-down blazers and shiny leather briefcases. When asked about college memories, the silliest ones shine through: playing Kahlua Pong at the neighbors because we ran out of beer, drowning a cockroach to death over the course of three days at La Veta because no one would man up to squish the thing with our own hands; all-nighters in the newsroom that drove us so delirious with exhaustion that we set up photo shoots with a Barbie doll and had dance competitions to Michael Jackson. I can't remember having those feelings, of which I can only describe as being light, since graduating college.

I am waiting for that lightness to catch up to me in the life I have now. Maybe it never does, and that's the part of being an adult they don't tell you about when you're young and can't wait to not have a curfew and be able to order a beer with dinner. But I am waiting to feel unconditionally loved by someone other than my mom; to feel professionally independent and sure; for everything to fall into its right place.

I am waiting to feel rooted in life.

a post for no real reason

Because I really, really needed a laugh tonight, here is a great "Parks and Recreation" video I discovered this evening that is (be warned) definitely NSFW. But I'm sorry, egotistical, F-bomb dropping Rob Lowe is about the greatest thing I've ever seen:

Rob Lowe Goes Nuts from Rob Lowe

And here are some women I want to be friends with and invite over for a spectacular dinner party:

You know those "Hey, Girl" Ryan Gosling memes that are everywhere on the Internet? Here's the best one:

And here is a photograph that makes me all sorts of infinitely happy: